The Elephant in the Room
<520 words> I was at a meeting a while back, in a room with a low ceiling, comfortably seating about 8 people around a board room table; plastic water bottles and everything. During the conversation someone mentioned that there was an elephant in the room – with reference to something we all knew and thought…
Our own role in creating conflict – how human are you, in my eyes?
How do we see other people? I know so many people who say ‘I don’t like conflict…I avoid conflict….’, and yet I’ve heard them talk about other people in ways that invites particular behaviours – behaviours that reinforce their (usually negative) perception of those other people.
We create our own conflicts typically without consciously intending to, and then we’re surprised when we discover that other people have seen us in ways we don’t think are true. If I see you as a lesser being; if I see you as an object; it is much easier to feel justified in how I characterise and judge you.
The Costs of Unresolved Conflict
“Research has shown” – yes, it HAS! That unresolved conflict is bad for your bottom line. There are direct (visible) costs and there are indirect (hidden costs. Negative consequences follow failure to act; positive consequences await the business owner/manager who steps in and manages conflict.
GOOD WORKPLACE DYNAMICS IS THE SWING VOTE THAT TAKES YOUR BUSINESS TO THE NEXT LEVEL.
I can walk away…I always walk away.
I keep learning the benefits of choosing how to respond to a conflict situation. I learnt the truth that there is no single objective truth; just a range of perspectives. I also learnt the healing power of truth and reconciliation. The peace of mind that comes from taking time to understand and to be understood is one of the greatest destressors I have ever come across. It is a cornerstone for good mental health.
This isn’t a newly invented “app”: aboriginal societies and the major world religions know the value of dialog and creating common understanding.